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Giving away too much – When high interpersonal orientation gets in the way of better deals

Interpersonal Orientation (IO) provides an insight into social interaction between two individuals. People with high levels of IO are interested in building relationships with others. People with low levels of IO are less interested are less interested in building relationships, but more interested in what advantages they can get out of it.
The degree to which a negotiator operates interpersonal orientation depends also on the context of a negotiation. Whenever two negotiators with the same level of IO meet, there is less chance of the other being exploited. High levels result into high cooperative behavior and personal relations, whereas low levels result into self-oriented behavior and low trust between the parties.
If your levels of IO are too high, meaning you are too friendly and want to be friends with everybody, you are in danger of making a bad deal. You will feel bad asking for more and you won’t be able to drive a tough negotiation. When meeting a low IO negotiator, it is expected from you to look after your own interests as otherwise cooperative behavior will be exploited. The other party won’t take anything personal and pushes the negotiation forward. Especially in early stages those negotiations are used to mark out important terms and conditions to the deal.
In order to not give away easily when confronted with low IO, firstly address your needs and boundaries, as it gives you credibility to be a serious negotiator. Secondly, be conditionally cooperative (“If you do this, I will do that.”). And at last, don’t try to be a people pleaser. Don’t accommodate the other party just for harmony’s sake. Be confrontational when needed, make decisions without excuses, separate the people from the problem so the other party won’t take it personally. Every negotiator needs to be aware of their IO level and has to be able to adjust their IO depending on the appropriate circumstances.

This is a contribution by Jessica Planitzer, Negotiation Consultant, Octalo Negotiation
#negotiationskills #negotiationtraining

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