The book influence by Robert B. Cialdini, PH.D. has become
an international bestseller. This book on persuasion explains why people say
‘yes’ and how to apply this knowledge. He discusses six common principles which
he also calls mental short cuts as we rely on mental short cuts every time we
are faced with a decision. He explains how to use these principles, how to
become a skilled persuader and how to defend yourself from them.
In this post we will discuss the sixth principle – Authority
When we were little, we had to learn that we need to obey to
authority and that disobeying is punishable. The first lessons come from our
parents then we continue to get the messages of obedience at school and it continues
through our lives.
The power and the value of obedience lies within our
culture. How often do we hear someone saying: ‘This is against the law’; or
‘This is not allowed’. We often don’t question it as to why we are not allowed
to do something, we just comply.
As adults most of us we have a boss we must answer to because
they are in positions more senior to us and have more power.
Then there is the government or a judge we need to adhere to.
Obeying is rewarding and easy as we
don’t want to argue, justify or be in trouble with the law. And since obeying
makes our lives easy, we switch on an automatic response to obeying which can
be inappropriate and dangerous at times.
One of Cialdini’s examples of such obedience to authorities
is in medicine. Health professionals have that authority that most would never
question. What the doctor has ordered needs to be followed. The set up of the
medical institution is very hierarchical whereby judgement by a doctor would
never be challenged by health care staff only; by a doctor higher in authority
level. This is quite a dangerous system of automatic obedience amongst health
care professionals.
In aviation it was the same, the pilot was the authority and
the one who made the decisions; the pilot was never questioned which has led to
fatal accidents. Since then this system of automatic obedience has been
abolished for security reasons.
The first and most important step is to be aware that we are
all susceptible to obedience.
When in a negotiation you need to disobey the other party by
questioning everything; and if there is something you don’t like then challenge
it or leave. How often do we hear the other side saying: ‘This is company
policy’ or ‘This are our terms and conditions’. They are there to suit the other
party, not you hence you need to disobey and challenge them.
Secondly use the authority of the other party to your
advantage. Don’t be intimidated by their authority as they are also just people
and have their motivations, pressures and desires. Ask yourself, why are they
talking to me? What can I give them that they want?
You can also flip this around and use this understanding
that people are obeying authority to your advantage and make them obey to your
terms and conditions or your company policy.
Perhaps you are an authority in your field of practice, or
you have a title which gives you more authority over the other party.
What you can also do is hide behind an authority which could
be your boss.
Authority is an interesting influencing tactic, make sure
you see through it and use it to your advantage.
www.octalonegotiation.com
#influencing #negotiationskills #negotiationtraining
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